Expectations

I don't expect to get down to a size 2 from losing weight. I really only want to get down to a size.. 16? Yeah. A size 16. Possibly 14. Because that's what I used to be. A few years ago. These past three years have really caused me to put on alot of weight. And , y'know, that's okay. It's okay to put on weight. As long as you realize what went wrong and fix it. That's what I'm going to do. I'm going to fix it. And if all goes well, then I'll have lost the weight I want to by.. February? Yeah. I used a calorie calculator. For losing weight. In order to lose the weight I want to in 6 months, I am allowed to eat about 1100 calories a day with moderate exercise every day. So, I can do this. I will do this. I'm sick of being overweight. Sure, it'll change people's opinions of me, but I don't plan on changing my opinion of them. The people that have always harassed be and abused me for being overweight will not have any recognition from me whatsoever. Fuck 'em.

I have a scale here at home. But it's one that isn't as precise as it should be. Meaning it doesn't show the decimal points. And I'm okay with that. It'll be a bit discouraging some days, when I work really, really hard and it shows no progress. Oh well.  But, in order to lose weight, I'll need to get 8 hours of sleep every night. That'll be difficult for me, but oh well. I can do it.

I know it's okay to be larger, as long as you're at a healthy weight. Well, I'm not at a healthy weight. And I'm changing it. I need to. Another good thing, besides losing weight, is that my family won't insult me anymore. Well, I wouldn't say anymore, but they won't be able to poke fun at my weight. They can poke fun at the fact that I'm anti-social, bitchy, and whiny, but they will not be able to poke fun at my weight. I'm sick of being considered lazy when just because I'm overweight. People also automatically assume that because I'm larger, that I eat more. Guess what, assholes! That assumption is completely false. I eat next to nothing the majority of the time. Mostly because I feel self-conscious every time I do eat.

That's besides the point. I'm changing the way I live my life. I'm going to be more active. I'm going to change everything. Except for my personality and my style. I'm keeping my friends, too. They're amazing. They've helped me through a lot, and they'll help me through this.